Bryan Fischer: Ban everything

He’s getting harder and harder to spoof, but here goes…

AFA analyst calls for ban on everything

Tupelo, MS – Writing today for the website RenewMerica, Bryan Fischer asserted that all sex everywhere needs to be curtailed.

“Just one wrong move and you’re done for,” Fischer wrote. “It’s like cigarettes and gay sex, we are all one smoke or one hook up away from disaster.”

Fischer was reacting to a government report suggesting that one cigarette can be the one that kills you. “Of course, I naturally and initially thought of gay sex. Because gay sex spreads HIV, the first fab time could be your last.”

Extrapolating his thinking, Fischer noted that in Uganda heterosexual sex is the main driver of the spread of HIV/AIDS. This fact demands an aggressive strategy.

“Since one act of straight sex can kill you, the government should crack down on the practice,” Fischer advised. “There simply is no level of safe exposure to straight sex.”

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