Day of Silence and Golden Rule Pledge on Appalachian State University
As a result of the Golden Rule Pledge effort, I have met some really great folks. I am only going to mention one with this post but there are many more. I hope to share their experiences at the new Golden Rule Pledge website soon. I did want to here share one very early report from Jordyne Krumroy, a student at Appalachian State University in Boone, NC. Jordyne was an early supporter of the Golden Rule Pledge and as you will see, used it as a springboard to mobilize Christian groups on her campus for outreach. She wrote to me today (Saturday, the 26th) with her experiences of the day. It is long but well worth the read…
Yesterday was the Day of Silence. A national event where students on their campuses are silent for the entire day to bring awareness to the silencing of LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) students. This community has been daily silenced by the name-calling, bullying, and harassment simply because of their sexuality. Many Christians are confused about how to respond to this day because they do not agree with homosexuality, but they do agree that hatred based on it is not acceptable.
This year I decided to get involved. I went to Campus Crusade for Christ as well as Intervarsity Fellowship to present the idea of participating. They both said they wanted to participate but I was absolutely astonished when Campus Crusade said that not only did they want to support it as individuals, but as a ministry. When I heard this, my heart was pounding- it was a prayer come true.
I can’t give you a count of how many students from the ministries actually participated. It might have been one, or many. But to me, it was their sincere desire to do something that really hit me hard. I have long been frustrated with the Christian community’s response to the GLBT group. When Crusade called me, a little piece of anger towards the church was cast away.Students at our school chose to participate by duct taping their mouths shut in complete silence, and when people asked why, handing them a slip of paper that explained. While I was more than fine with doing this, I wanted to do more. I wanted to make it clear that not only do I love them, but Christ does also. So I made my own slips, not to preach, but to break down the walls between the Christian and LGBT communities. The slips I made said this:
“Today I am pledging to be silent to bring attention to the name-calling, bullying and harassment experienced by LGBT students.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Luke 6:31
As a follower of Christ, I believe that all people are created in the image of God and therefore deserve love and respect.”
Yesterday morning, when I went to the SAGA (Sexuality and Gender Alliance) table to receive my piece of duct tape, I showed them my slips and told them that several ministries would be participating as well. The look on their faces was priceless. They were shocked, but ecstatic. This alone would have been enough to make my day.
But there was still more to be done. Eric Heistand from Campus Crusade for Christ had the idea of bringing a flower to the head faculty advisor of SAGA. We left flowers and a card that read,
“Dear Mary Ballard and SAGA: As followers of Christ, we want to stand beside you in silence to bring attention to the name-calling, bullying and harassment on college campuses around the world directed toward the LGBT community. We believe that all people have been created in the image of God and therefore have infinite worth and dignity. May these flowers and our silence be a symbol of our desire to show true love and concern. May they also be small step in breaking down some of the walls that sometimes divide us. In silence we stand with you, Jordyne Krumroy Eric Heistand on behalf of Campus Crusade for Christ.”
At 5 pm, the students who participated gathered at a theatre to break the silence by letting a scream go and then talking about their experiences. I was 10 minutes late due to a nap, but when I got there people greeted me with hugs, handshakes, and smiling faces. I discovered that Mary Ballard, the teacher who we gave the flowers and card, read the card aloud to the community.
People came up to me shocked. Over and over, people said to me, “Thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me. I’m amazed. Thank you!” The students seemed really surprised that a ministry, especially a Christian ministry would do that. I talked with several students, but one student spoke with me for a while. She told me that she was so surprised and couldn’t believe her eyes that she had to read the card twice even before it was read aloud. I’m so grateful for the relationships that were begun yesterday just by pledging to be silent for less than 24 hours. Later that night I went to eat with several of them and hung out until the wee hours of the morning. It was wonderful.
To those of you reading, I wish I could tell you in person because this day deserves more than a short summary. Yesterday, the LGBT community saw something revolutionary- they saw Christians loving them and more than that, they saw the love of Christ. What would happen if next year, hundreds of Christian students walked around with duct tape in silence?
I have to tell you about how I felt yesterday walking around in silence with duct tape. I felt humiliated at times, and other times proud. You see, everywhere I went, people stared. I felt like a leper, completely stigmatized from people. In fact, I was experiencing what the LGBT community has experienced for decades.
As I was walking to my dorm, I realized why 30% of LGBT students report having missed one or more days of school per year out of fear. Walking by a dorm, someone opened their window and yelled a derogatory statement to me. I was scared. There was such anger in his voice that I was fearful to walk by the dorm again later that day. I was reminded of Lawrence King, a 14 year old who was murdered because of his homosexuality just two months ago.
Yesterday was amazing. The best day of the year by far. The truth is, this group has been disappointed by the church. I know that as people read that, some will become angry with me. ‘Not my church’ they will say. But when “Christians” hold signs on campus that read, “ God hates Fags.” and “fags burn in hell,” the LGBT community associates that with Christianity. Many people have told me that they have never said anything derogatory to the gay community, but the problem is they haven’t said anything at all. You see, half of the church is screaming hate at them, and the other half is silent. If there is one thing I have learned, it is that silence is powerful. The failure to not say anything, has said a lot.
This [Golden Rule Pledge] was a great first step for me to get out there in ministry. So thanks so much to you!
I don’t know how to end this note, but hopefully there won’t be an end. This is just the beginning…
I have to tell you, I am moved and humbled. I am proud of those Campus Crusade and IVP ministries and others like them around the country who stepped away from fear and up to the plate. More stories to come…
Excellent!
I am standing up and applauding you ! This is what TRUE Christianity is all about. I am a filmmaker and I have been working on a documentary called For Such A Time As This for over 2 years. The vision for it has been on my heart for 18 years and this is it’s goal… to encourage people to reach out in love to the gay community. I wish I had interviewed you and would love to in the future. When this becomes the norm we will have made tremendous progress. We are at a very special time in history…these are defining moments …God wants the church door’s and our hearts opened wide so that ALL of God’s people can come people in…it’s TIME… it Is For Such A Time As This! Let’s keep going …it’s time to change the world one heart and miind at a time. God Bless you and thank you for sharing. Keep up the amazing work! http://www.hopeunlimitedproductions.com
This is wonderful - it really is - but it would be nice to start hearing conservative Christians not talking about the divide between Christians and the LGBT community as if these are always two separate groups - it comes off as patronizing at times and is ignorant of the fact that many gay people ARE Christians.
This young student did what was appropriate. She did not try to coopt the Day of Silence by presenting an alternative message. She held up the Day of Silence to speak out, not for the Golden Rule but to proclaim that gays and lesbians are harassed. That she herself was harassed for doing so speaks volumes.
Perhaps one day Christians in general will learn to follow Christ instead of the James Dobsons, Timothy Perkins, and Ken Hutchersons of the world.
My congratulations to this young Christian leader. Now if only her elders would follow Christ as well.
Warren,
This response goes so far beyond what I expected–especially for a first time effort. In my imaginings I pictured the silence, I pictured an exchange of the message cards but I didn’t even dream of the gesture of sending the rose and message of support to the GLBT leader. And to top that off with actually meeting face to face and hanging out for awhile. Priceless!
I appreciate this participant’s understanding of the distorted messages that the church is sending. I’d have given anything to be ‘a fly on the wall’ listening to that wonderful conversation that went on into the wee hours.
These are now people who have ‘connected’. When they pass each other on campus, they’ll now greet each other and occasionally chat. They’ll actually start taking interest in each other’s bulletin board postings and event announcements. I’d love to hear an update on this one in a few weeks or months!
Yesterday, the LGBT community saw something revolutionary- they saw Christians loving them and more than that, they saw the love of Christ.
This quote in particular is problematic - it seems to assume gay people and especially gay Christians have never experienced Christian love in action, and furthermore, doesn’t allow for the fact that many of the gay people may in fact be loving Christians themselves. I’m sure this girl didn’t mean to suggest these things, and I’m with Eddy, this connection is a wonderful thing. Perhaps when the two groups chat in the future they will both gain a new understanding for the other and treat each other as EQUALS who deserve both love AND respect.
That is my hope anyway
History has shown us that when those who have in the past been anti-gay really get to know gay people - intolerance and inequality usually don’t last long
I like the statement. Can anyone reword it so it’s not problematic? I don’t like the idea of changing it to ‘conservative Christians’ because there are gay conservative Christians as well.
Saying that ‘they saw the love of Christ’ isn’t suggesting that they had never seen or experienced the love of Christ. I can walk into a church and see and feel the love of Christ…something I’ve been seeing and feeling for years. But it is always good to see and feel it through people. It rekindles my hope.
I am so overwhelmed and happy!!! This is excellent news! This makes my day.
Wow!
I am impressed. This again forces me to question why Exodus cannot see to participate and endorse the Day of Silence as well.
Thanks for posting this.
She didn’t just say they saw the love of Christ - She said they saw something REVOLUTIONARY - which almost implies a never-before-seen-thing. That was my only point.
I don’t want to get into a drawn- out argument over her words and detract from the fact that this is a great thing that has happened - I just want some conservative Christians to be careful about the words they use and how they are sound.
How about just saying “some conservative Christians” or “some Christians” - it doesn’t have to be anymore difficult than that
Eddy -
She didn’t just say they saw the love of Christ - She said they saw something REVOLUTIONARY - which almost implies a never-before-seen-thing. That was my only point.
I don’t want to get into a draw out argument over her words and detract from the fact that this is a great thing that has happened - I just want some conservative Christians to be careful about the words they use and how they sound.
How about just saying “some conservative Christians”
Good grief - sorry - I was having browser/submission issues
I think your suggestion does solve the one problem but, unfortunately, creates another. The new wording would suggest that only conservative Christians have or have had issues with responding appropriately to gays. But we’re on the right track.
You are correct, even though there is a spectrum of inappropriate responses to gay people - some worse than others - and not all Christians have responded inappropriately.
And many who aren’t Christians at all.
Yes
If anyone was curious how Ken Hutcherson responded to the DOS, here’s a link to THAT article - I just ran across it about 30 min. ago:
Ken Hutcherson and the DOS
Exodus doesn’t really have much, if any, presence in schools or colleges so I’m not exactly sure how they would participate. Perhaps by next year’s DOS, they can direct people to Warren’s humble outreach.
Eddy and Jayhuck,
Is there any difference between how a Christian (conservative or otherwise) and someone of another religion or no religion responds?
The way Jordyne demonstrated her faith and belief leading up to and on the DOS is a very good example of allowing religion to enable rather than hinder doing what is morally right. She extended herself to reach out to others and get involved for their protection and in doing so, developed camaraderie and future friends.
She saved the best for last - “but hopefully there won’t be an end. This is just the beginning.”
Jordyne is a good friend of mine. She read my book (Loving Homosexuals as Jesus Would) about a year ago and I have been “coaching” her for a while now. I am so proud of her for putting her faith into practice so boldy! We should not just be agreeing with LGBTs that harassment based on sexuality is not OK, but as Christians we should be LEADING the effort to take a stand against those who ostracize and condemn those who are gay, regardless of whether or not we agree with them theologically. Jordyne is a shining example of what that looks like in real life.
ASU was my second choice for going to college. I’m perfectly happy where I’m at now, but I would have loved to have gone there just to have participated in this event. Way to go Jordyne! I’m especially proud of that campus’ Campus Crusade for Christ and Intervarsity. So cool!
Ann–
There shouldn’t be. I can appeal to a Christian since I understand the value system they subscribe too but many bullies, bashers and unconcerned bystanders aren’t Christian at all. I don’t want to overlook trying to communicate a “live and let live” attitude to them.
[…] Warren Throckmorton has a letter from a student at Appalachian State University in Boone, NC. She, and the Campus Crusade, participated in the Day of Silence and found it to be rewarding and illuminating. To those of you reading, I wish I could tell you in person because this day deserves more than a short summary. Yesterday, the LGBT community saw something revolutionary- they saw Christians loving them and more than that, they saw the love of Christ. What would happen if next year, hundreds of Christian students walked around with duct tape in silence? […]
I have a friend who attends University in Canada. The gay group on campus was selling flowers as a fund raiser for AIDS research. Even though a lot of the Christians on campus wouldn’t buy a flower because “that’s supporting homosexuality,” my friend Tyson was able to get his Christian group on campus to actually help the gay group sell the flowers. After all, EVERYONE should be against AIDS shouldn’t they? I can’t remember for sure if the Christian group was Campus Crusade or InterVarsity, but I know it was one of those two groups, and I was very proud of them for doing that because they took a LOT of heat from the ultra-conservative religious people on campus…
Eddy,
I agree. What I was referring to is that all people should be included and feel capable of doing what is morally right in their responses. With that kind of solidarity, any activity contrary to what the DOS and Golden Rule stands for will not be tolerated and certainly be met with a mountain of resistance to it.
Ann,
Is there any difference between how a Christian (conservative or otherwise) and someone of another religion or no religion responds?
Not that I can think of
The way Jordyne demonstrated her faith and belief leading up to and on the DOS is a very good example of allowing religion to enable rather than hinder doing what is morally right.
I absolutely agree with you
I think it would be interesting to hear from any gay Christians who might have taken part in the events and how they responded to the other, perhaps, more conservative Christians participating in the DOS this year.
These are just interesting figures that I wasn’t aware of. They come from the article I posted a link to above. The DOS was observed by approximately 7,000 high schools and colleges around the country, and the DOS has “been observed nationally for the past 13 years”. I feel out of the loop - I didn’t realize it had been around that long.
“I talked with several students, but one student spoke with me for a while. She told me that she was so surprised and couldn’t believe her eyes that she had to read the card twice even before it was read aloud.”
I was the one student in particular that she referred to. Jordyne is my new personal hero. I have talked with her for hours since Friday about the DOS and Christian/GLBT issues that society is faced with today. People like her give me hope for unity in diversity…something this world desperately needs. I have learned so much from her already and I’m hoping to join her in her cause.
As a member of the GLBT community that was raised in the “Christian” faith that was very anti-homosexuality, I developed strong opposition for Christians as a whole because of it. Jordyne, over these few days since the DOS has changed these misconceived views and I fully respect what true Christianity is and stands for. I plan on working with Jordyne in her future endeavors to help tear down this misguided wall that has been built between the GLBT community and the Christian faith. My hope is that both side can come together with love and respect for one another.
Chad,
Your work is a shining example. Your message and voice are welcome amongst the usual clatter. Thank you for helping bridge the gap between gays and christians.
Yes Chad - Its good to hear from you - Its been awhile
Chad,
Please include me in on what Mary and Jayhuck wrote to you - I share the same sentiments.
I think this is a formula we all can agree with. It doesn’t diminish the main theme that GLBT kids are subject to more harrassment than any other group: and it maintains a Christian message. It encourages the receiver to find out more about Christianity.
I think it’s rather less than half screaming hate, but they make up for the numbers by the volume of their voices. And the number preaching against hate is so small as to escape notice. That’s the main problem, and the reason why so many GLBT people are turned away from Christianity.
The only thing necessary for the triumph [of evil] is for good men to do nothing. as Burke said.
I am confused as to where in this response that the Christians indicated that they don’t support the LGBT lifestyle. I agree with everything that was said on the card, but it is what was not said that was the issue. Looking from the outside in, this would give me the impression that Christians are supportive of homosexuality.
Matt,
We support people in their right not to be violated against in violent and malicious ways. We support people to be loved and cared about regardless of their beliefs and sexual orientation. We serve those who are oppressed, less fortunate, and suffering. And yes, we support homosexuals because they are people - no less.
[…] can read here about a student at Appalachian State University, Jordyne Kumroy, and Jordyne’s experience. […]
The way the day of silence was approached was wonderful! This effort is exciting, encouraging and hopeful …
I agree that there are many wonderful spirit-filled Christians who happen to be gay. I have interviewed and met hundreds if not thousands of them over the past 2 years while working on my documentary, “For Such A Time As This”.
I have also met and interviewed many wonderful ex-gays and ex-ex-gays and all the key players from “both sides” of “the divide” in for lack of a better word the “culture war” on this issue and unfortunately there is still a divide. I interviewed people from Love Won Out, Love in Action, Focus on the Family, Exodus, and I even interviewed Dr. Throckmorton and Chad Thompson. Hi guys! We have some of the founding members of Love in Action and Exodus. Kent Philpott, Frank Worthen and John Evans and Michael Bussee to name just a few.
There are many people who are being a wonderful examples of Christ’s love to the gay community. I wish they had the loudest voices and we’re heard more often in the main stream .
It is obvious to most followers of Christ that the greatest commandments are to Love God and to Love your “neighbor” as yourself. Simply put to ” Love one another!”
My hope is that people can learn to agree to disagree if necesssary but treat each other with dignity Love and Respect at ALL times in ALL places with ALL People!
We have been disagreeing about things within the body of Christ for a very long time…perhaps people are finally starting to “get it” and realize that our job is to love and meet people where they are . if God wants to “change” something or someone HE will be the one who facilitates it not us..I think it’s important as Christian’s to allow God be God …. then we might all be able to stop doing our best impressions of Him . It’s so easy to take other peoples inventory, isn’t it? I’ve been guilty of it myself ! ! I’m pretty sure we’re just supposed to invite ALL the people into God’s house and let him sort out everyone’s issue’s.
Many Christians don’t seem to realize that by being exclusive and trying to pick and choose the members that we are in a sense “aborting souls” ( an extreme term but it seems appropriate) by turning people away and leaving them “outside” with the impression and the message that God “hates them” we are doing tremendous damage in the name of Christ. There is still a lot of “repair work” that needs to be done. This story is an example of the “repair work in progress” we all need to do our part.
God is no respector of persons and if we are going to exclude “sinners” we might as well close up all the churches and go home. We’re all sinners…saved by Grace. When we start measuring other people’s “sin” we end up condemning and judging ourselves. Why is that not preached more often from the pulpit?
Judge Not, lest WE be judged. I’m just hoping that we are in a time of a GREAT AWAKENING! Let’s hope so. It ok to reach out in love to the gay community , if I’m reading my bible correctly I believe we are commanded to reach out to everyone that way.
Keep up the great work!
Lisa,
As a once gay activist and now ex gay - I am eager to watch your documentary. Leaving homosexuality did not include forgetting that gay people deserve respect. Becoming a christian did not make me a ranting right wing supporter. It made me a christian. You rock!!!
Lelia-
How great of you to stop by and bring more of the story. Please come back.
Lisa–
Very well said. Thank you!
Mary–
I thought your response to Matt was a keeper. Well said and point made.
Zoe–
You said:
and I not only agree with you but I think you said it memorably!
Lisa,
Thank you so much for this acknowledgment of their existance - many gay and lesbian Christians will be thankful
I agree that there are many wonderful spirit-filled Christians who happen to be gay.
Hi All,
Thank you for your support. It’s nice to find that some people actually agree on something. It was extremely discouraging perparing for the DOS and trying to get christians involved. I felt very alone.
Here is my question: what are we as individuals going to do from now until April 25, 2009? I am so thankful for what happened last friday, but I don’t want to have to wait until next year to do the same. Perhaps we can facilitate discussion on practical ways that we can love this community specifically more and more?
It’s been fun reading all the comments! Don’t stop posting.
Jordyne,
I can’t think of anything as big as the DOS that you could take part in again, but my advice would be to just stay involved with the community. You could get involved in some of the other events hosted by the gay campus group? And I don’t mean to sound patronizing by saying this but just treat your gay neighbor as an equal, with love and respect - as you did when you participated in the DOS. There is nothing worse sometimes than a Christian on a mission, if you know what I mean
If there are gay and lesbian Christian activities you might join in on those as well. I wish you well Jordyne. Thank you for all you did to help out at your school with the DOS this year 
:)
Lisa says:
Jordyne and Jayhuck,
I’m sure you have probably met many already but there are some pretty amazing people out there that I would love to introduce you to…
There is so much happening…. “For Such A Time As This! This is a very special year and many of us our praying for HUGE break thru’s in the body of Christ and beyond. It’s beginning to happen! I believe people who are truly “connected” and are are listening to what the Spirit is saying to the churches will all be a part of this great awakening!
It’s time. 40 years ago some very significant things began. During the Jesus movement an Evangelist by the name of Lonnie Frisbee baptised thousands in the Pacific Ocean and Calvary Chapel , the Vineyard and the church grew in leaps and bounds. During that time this country experienced a spiritual explosion. Perhaps we are on the brink of another one.
Many came to the Lord during that time., Many people within conservative Christianity actually believed that Hippie’s couldn’t be saved . I’m reminded of the book of Act when folks didn’t believe gentiles could be saved. But the Holy Spirit was poured out on ALL flesh. And ALL means ALL!
God is NO respecter of person’s. Jesus was inclusive and His favorite people have always been the “outcasts” they have become mine as well. There is nothing more refreshing than someone who is REAL, HUNGRY and AUTHENTIC.
A few people I admired greatly believed as do I that the next great move of God will be among the gay community! ( Its happening!) But it won’t be church as usual…things need to change…hearts and minds need to open and be willing to accept that God is doing a NEW thing! Religion as usual just won’t cut it anymore! It doesn’t work and legalism kills people spirits. Grace is truly amazing and once you have tasted of God’s Grace you won’t want to be entangled again in a yoke of bondage.
The harvest is ripe….The only thing we need to do is Love people right where they are …God will take care of the rest.
It’s so simple that some folks will miss it but those who are called and are paying attention will realize we are living in a very exciting time in history. Walls will fall! They will come tumbling down in many people hearts and that is when real change will take place in people’s lives. But it won’t be as they may have expected…again God is doing a new thing.
http://www.hopeunlimitedproductions.com
I would love to talk with you at some point. I think we are sharing the same heart.
God bless you.
Lisa
Jordyne,
1. You rock! I was really moved by your story and am really proud of the Cru. and IV members who got involved. It’s really awesome.
2. This may sound weird, but I put your name in Facebook (it’s the thing for a college kid to do, people) and it turns out we have some mutual friends (I also go to one of the UNC colleges, and have friends at ASU). I was wondering if you minded if I added you? I want to learn from your experiences and see if I can do anything at my own college.
Hey Jay,
Thats fine. lol.
(did anyone see Lelia’s comment????!!!)
Leila,
I was raised in a liberal home and was a lesbian and now consider myself ex gay. I too have felt the “God hates you!” feeling from the church. But I am learning that there are some real heros (like the ones you’ve met) who are worth my friendship and investment. I am so glad that you were able to hear (through all the other muck) a real message of Christ. Sister - you belong to God and we are all in this together. Hope to hear more from you.
Thanks Jordyne for adding that in there, lol.
I don’t think i can ever be ex-gay…I figured out my sexuality very young in life…it’s not about loving a specific gender…it’s about loving a person. if you wanted to label me, i would be bisexual but it’s not a liking boys and girls thing- i like\love people. I was raised in a very southern traditional southern baptist church(es) that really preached against homosexuality which led to me having strong negative feelings about Christianity. I didn’t, and still don’t, see why I’m so wrong for loving people. Going through my early teenage years I took a look at my faith/views and realized it wasn’t for me. I struggled with the idea with a god, and came to the firm belief that I would never honesty/truly know if there was or wasn’t a god until I in fact died. I then decided I would live my life to be the best moral, compassionate, loving, helping, altruistic, good person I could possibly be and that I should hope that if there is a god, he/she/it would see the life I led, or tried to lead and would judge me fairly. I don’t deny that there is a god, I just don’t honestly know, if that makes sense (I guess this is called being agnostic and not atheist ). With that said, I fully support anyone’s right to practice whatever religion they think is correct. I even support my friends and attend some of their religious gatherings/holidays/observations to gain a better knowledge of what is different than me (I’m a diversity nut! I love other cultures/ideas/beliefs that are different than my own). Sunday night I went to a Christian Church gathering with Jordyne (as a side note, I was pleasantly surprised by the people that were there and how nice & down to earth & accepting they were…just like Jordyne!) and last Monday I witnessed my first Jewish Passover Dinner was well, which I found to be very neat and informative. I hope sharing my background/beliefs/sexuality doesn’t offend anyone, ya’ll seem like a very open-minded and accepting group
For being on the “other side of the fence”, I plan on helping Jordyne bring the Christian and GLBT communities together to develop peace, respect, love, and understanding amongst one another to end these bad feelings and misperceptions between the groups. I really appreciate the support you all have shown Jordyne and the GLBT community in respect that we are are people too and that we deserve no less than to be treated as a human. On a personal level, I’m finally seeing what a true Christian is and it makes my heart smile
Peace, love, & all things good,
Lelia
Lelia,
You are pretty awesome in your own right. Peace, love and all things good to you as well
Eddy said: “Exodus doesn’t really have much, if any, presence in schools or colleges so I’m not exactly sure how they would participate.” Funny. They sure don’t have any trouble figuring out how to get involved in politics or support outrageous comments by the likes of Sally Kern.
Here’s how: Next year, officially announce a “Golden Rule” approach and post it on the EXODUS website. Issue a press release. Then call and send letters to all EXODUS affiliates encouraging them to do something similar to what Jordyne has done. It would be easy. Will EXODUS do it? No.
Jordyne: You said “It was extremely discouraging perparing for the DOS and trying to get christians involved. I felt very alone.” Try not to be discouraged. Christians often resist doing the right thing — the just and compassionate thing — especially when it comes to the “gay issue” They are worried that they might look like they are somehow supporting the “gay lifestyle”. They are complacent and/or frightened. God Bless you, Jordyne and don’t give up. I imagine Jesus felt very alone at times too.
Michael,
Could you call or write Exodus and make those suggestions and offer/extend yourself to them as a conduit to make it turn out just the way you suggested? After that effort has been made then you will know whether they will do it or not.
Ann, I think maybe all of us should write or call Exodus. Why just Michael? We should all let them know about The Golden Rule thing and tell them to do this instea d of the “Day of Truth”
Jordan,
Good idea and I believe that is already happening. Michael had some very valuable suggestions that he felt Exodus would not carry out. I felt if he shared those suggestions with them directly and helped them follow-through then he would know for sure whether they would do it or not. Perhaps he already has and I don’t know it.
Mike Bussee has been offering his suggestions, guidance and wisdom for several years now….Mikey, do you think they are listening and will you try again?
We all keep hoping and praying for breakthroughs but they are coming slowly.
Eventually it will happen but with who is the key. The leader who has the strength of character and moral conviction to do the right thing will be the hero. That person will set things in motion and help change things forever. But who will that BRAVE soul be? Or who will those Brave SOULS Be? People are looking for permission to do the right thing! It’s time to stop being sheep and following the wrong leaders!
Politics and Religion DO NOT MIX. That is a toxic and dangerous cocktail. Someone will have to be willing to get back to the Gospel and put down their Political power and go up against the MACHINE. It is very much a David and Goliath story!
My friend Micah Qualls is being intimidated by Mike Huckabee a former “pastor “and Vice President hopeful who was responsible for getting her fired. She is a Christian who exercised her first amendment rights and is being rail-roaded and called a liar by powerful people in office who “claim ” to be Christian. Actions speak louder than words. The story is going National today.
We have been waiting on Alan for years to actually follow through with something he said he would do…It’s not happened yet. We continue to wait, pray and hold out hope. Perhaps it will be someone else who makes a lasting impression.
I mean no disrespect but I do wonder if it will ever happen with the same group of people who have had the opportunity for years to do something hopeful and helpful. Perhaps a changing of the guard is in order?
Wendy Gritter gave the best address EVER at an Exodus meeting and I spoke with Alan who was supportive behind the scenes, but did not want to commit as strongly publicly as he did quietly with several of us .
Wendy is someone to watch and listen to…she has her heart and her mind in the right place. She seems to be hearing what the spirit is saying to the churches. It’s time to put down the rhetoric and the politics and open the church doors to everyone. We need not wait for those who want to remain where they are…
Keep knocking! Keep Praying and Keep doing the right thing. Walk in love and do unto others! Love is the Answer! It’s as simple as that and when you err on the side of Love you will always end up in the right place.
As we all know, many people read this blog who do not write in. I’d like to think that those at Exodus are reading this and will add a link for the Golden Rule Pledge to their website. And honestly - Alan chambers? Are you there - aren’t you tired of being the puppet? Can you start leading with the conviction that is on your heart instead of treading in still waters with fear? I’m not trying to be mean - just trying to understand why this should even be a consideration.
Lisa,
Thank you for pointing this out - I did not know this or the extent to which it had been done. From the responses I have seen and received I am really unsure about a lot of things now. It often seems to me that for some it is more important to be right than build bridges.
Good luck with your documentary - it sounds really wonderful.
Ann asked: “Could you call or write Exodus and make those suggestions and offer/extend yourself to them as a conduit to make it turn out just the way you suggested?”
Ann, I have made suggestions and will continue to do so. I just do not believe EXODUS will do it. For example, inspired by Wendy Gritter, they said they would get out of politics (”mainly because God” directed them to) — and they haven’t done that. Alan Chambers said he wanted to “officially retire” confusing term “ex-gay” — and he hasn’t done that. Following the Berger and Schoenewolf debacles, Alan said he would dump NARTH “if they’re weren’t some big changes” — and he hasn’t done that.
I know that Alan and others in leadership positions at EXODUS read this blog and other blogs regularly — even though they don’t comment very often. They are listening. It’s the doing that they seem to have trouble with.
Another example: a couple of years ago, I noticed that the EXODUS web site had very strong statements about/against Hate Crime laws, but nothing about the hate itself. I began calling and emailing Alan Chambers — OK, I’ll admit it — I bugged him incessantly to adopt and post a clear and strong official anti-hate/anti-bullying/anti-violence policy.
It took over a year — and did not happen until I threatened to tell an LA Times reporter that EXODUS was stalling. Then, what they did finally come up with with rather weak — and is still not posted prominently on the EXODUS homepage.
So that is why I have little confidence that EXODUS will actually do something morally courageous related to the DOS — as Jordyne has done. It’s a resistance that I do not understand.
Michael,
I was just over at the EXODUS website and read the April 2008 letter from the president. Sad to say it was mostly about money and requests for donations. Nothing about Day of Silence, Day of Truth, or Golden Rule Pledge - all very big items in the month of April for those who are christian and/or gay. Everyone here - and those who are organizers - if you come up with a good plan where we can unite a strong and single message in some action - count me in.
Jordyne..
WOW. I am so encouraged and excited to see the Lord at work through you. As Christians, there is such a tendancy to embrace and even hoard the love of Christ for ourselves, and offer others nothing but hate or indifference.
I’m so excited to see someone I grew up with and worshiped with joining for a cause that is so worthwhile! Participating in the DOS through the Golden Rule Initiative has really opened up my eyes..
Im proud of you, girl!
Michael,
Thanks so much for your response. I’m sorry that I do not know as much about Exodus and/or your efforts toward them as others do. I always try to be articulate and informed about what I write but even in my best efforts I can see from the responses on this and other subjects that I have failed and that is disheartening.
I do understand your thoughts about Exodus and the reasons behind them now
Mary: Why am I not surprised? This was another opportunity, another teaching moment completely missed by EXODUS. I checked Alan Chambers and Randy Thomas’ personal blogs and there’s nothing there either.
I rechecked the EXODUS webpage. There is a press-release about the Day of Truth, which is described as “an opportunity for students to express an alternate view on homosexuality and to encourage a free exchange of ideas“. The DOT is also desribed as “an opportunity for students to express an alternate view on homosexuality and to encourage a free exchange of information on this issue and desperately needed answers beyond the culture’s hopeless, groundless ‘born-gay’ response.”
Come on EXODUS! The Day of Silence was in no way an attempt to promote a “hopeless, groundless ‘born-gay’ response.” It’s about doing what is loving and just — something Jesus would do. The EXODUS press release says </nothing specific about anti-gay bullying, hatred or violence. That’s only hinted at by offering “a series of video and print resources that help Christian students to understand the facts about homosexuality and to demonstrate compassion towards their gay-identified peers.”
Come on EXODUS. You can do better than that. Post Throckmorton’s Golden Rule Intiative on your website — and keep it there — taking a stand, boldly and specifically condemning anti-gay hatred and violence — not just peddling your videos and printed materials
Same old stuff different day…
Oh boy! Why is it that these christian organizations always position themselves in opposition to others rather than in union with the spirit to serve others.
EXODUS should have a tag line on their website:
“We care. But we would care more if you wanted to change.”
Jordyne, Lelia:
Please don’t be dismayed by the cynicism expressed here. Please don’t be misled by it either. You’ve probably never heard of Exodus and now you hear all this. Exodus is a loose-knit coalition of Christian ministries with specific concern for gays. It’s members are largely people who consider themselves ‘ex-gay’…most are living in a state of celibacy while a small number have moved on into heterosexual marriage. They regard homosexual behavior as sin yet recognize that it was God who reached out to them drawing them to salvation.
I was a part of Exodus for more than a decade; Michael was one of its founders some 30 years ago. I still believe that the behavior is sin but I don’t see it as any bigger than any other sin; Michael no longer sees it as sin and, I believe, sees it as a gift. And we have other exciting (and challenging) mixes going on. So, things do get ’snarky’ at times but, if you’ll notice the frequent commenters listings on the side bar, you’ll see evidence that we do we keep coming back. We’ve got that “Throck Connection”. (Which reminds me: Explore this site. There used to be an easy link to Warren’s music site. His band’s name is “Throckmorton“. If not there, I’m sure he’s on YouTube.)
I think I just got a brilliant idea. One of you asked ‘what next?’ What about the possibility of your two groups (or members from both) meeting to draft an anti-bullying statement? Perhaps for inclusion in the student handbook–or as a sponsored ad in a student publication. And make it so good, that other schools and churches would see its simple truth and they’d start posting it too.
If you like a sense of urgency, how about getting something together for the next edition of your campus newspaper: “Looking back at the Day Of Silence”. LOL! Campus Crusaders are probably as misunderstood as gay people are. Both groups could use the good press.
Lelia,
I also want to say how much I enjoyed your posts. I tried to write this earlier and echoed Jayhuck’s post to you but it didn’t go through. Anyway, my heart was full knowing the connection you and Joydyne made and how you want to work with each other to build this bridge and connect people. When you said that you realized what a true Christian was and it made your heart smile was one of the most important things I have ever heard and I find myself humbled because of it.
Since my first post didn’t go through - let me echo Jayhuck’s sentiments that he wrote to you in post #98911
p.s. - I meant to say Jordyne, not Joydyne
This gives me hope. I have been writing at my own blog (www.scg-wakeupcall.blogspot.com) about the need for Christians and the LGBT community to put down the swords and beat them into plowshares, if you will. And mine is from the lesbian Christian perspective. Hats off to those CCfC students. You did a very important, and truly Christian act.
Eddy said: “I still believe that the behavior is sin but I don’t see it as any bigger than any other sin; Michael no longer sees it as sin and, I believe, sees it as a gift.” Not quite. I see sexuality as a gift — like fire. It can warm or destroy. It all depends on how you use it. Sin is determined by the motivation of the heart, not by whether or not it appears on a list of do’s and don’ts. Man looks at the outward behavior. God sees the heart.
I concur Michael. I get Exodus’s newsletter/webpage too. You’re right about what is sin and what isn’t.
Usually sin could be explained as EXCESS of things that are vital to our lives. Like eating. We must eat, but gluttony will have attendant results.
Same as drinking wine or other alcohol. Excess will alter your behavior and competence and over a long period damage your body.
There is sex, within a monogamous and mutually supportive relationship, and then there is promiscuity with all IT’S attendant risks and results and disconnection from the spirit of love.
Excellent.
Matt Beeman said:
“I am confused as to where in this response that the Christians indicated that they don’t support the LGBT lifestyle. I agree with everything that was said on the card, but it is what was not said that was the issue. Looking from the outside in, this would give me the impression that Christians are supportive of homosexuality.”
This is the sort of response I always find fascinating. Why do you think it is always necessary to tell people you don’t support their “lifestyle”? It’s quite an arrogant presupposition.
You are assuming that every glbt person is having the sex you think is wrong. Why do you jump to this conclusion, and why is it any of your business to guess what people are doing in their own beds? There are many Christians who identify as gay but who remain celibate, and there are many other gay people who for whatever reasons are abstaining.
Can’t you just love people unconditionally?