Reader email…

The following email received 8/31 was refreshing. It is reproduced with the permission of the sender.

I’m sure you have found many in the gay community who take issue with your writings and stance on issues of sexuality. However, as a self-identifying gay man, I want to commend you on your site, www.drthrockmorton.com, which I visited for the first time today. While I do not agree with your views personally and have no desire to alter my own orientation, I think that every person should be able to make their own decision free from extreme bias or pressure from either side of the issue. I get quite upset when gay leaders lash out at persons such as yourself, when it is clear that you are simply presenting a view that is as valid as any other. Those of us truly comfortable in identifying as gay don’t feel threatened by your work. I have a very happy and fulfilling life with my gay partner, and if sexual orientation is safely changeable, than why not be happy for those who want to change and encourage them to change safely with the assistance of a qualified professional? If a person freely seeks that out, what is wrong with that? After all, the gay community is more than happy to welcome a person who lived in heterosexual relations, some married for years, who then “come out” as gay. It would be hypocritical to disapprove of a welcoming community for those who decide to “come out” as straight.

Sincerely,

Frank Kiraly
Columbia, SC

2005 article by Daryl Bem

Found this article recently by Daryl Bem. Not sure I agree with every point (I am not finished thinking about it) but this article may give some insight into the experience of some ex-gay men who report the experience of being attracted to their wives with some remaining same sex attraction. I think it addresses some of the discussion on this blog.

(2017 update) – For some reason, this 2005 post did not have a link to the Bem article. It was one of the very early posts on the blog and may not have transferred from Blogger to WordPress to Patheos. Because of fresh interest in the concepts involved, I added the link.