Comments on: I am scheduled to be on CNN Newsroom Sunday

By: Kyle

Kyle — Wed, 30 May 2018 18:28:52 +0000

Interesting statistics. I would think the men who are largely gay but who do not need sexual fantasies when making love with their wives (because they are sexually attracted to them) are in relatively healthy marriage. I would think a woman could flourish in that relationship, for she is being desired sexually by her husband. The other ones, I’m not so sure…in fact I doubt that I would call them healthy.

By: Dave

Dave — Wed, 30 May 2018 18:28:52 +0000

Hi Kyle,
To be quite honest with you I am a bit hesitant to get inside people heads when they are making love and speculate on whether the sexuality is healthy or not. I think too that you are missing a point here .. this isn’t all about sex. Its about who you feel intimate with .. and intimacy is more than sex. You can have sex without intimacy .. and you can have intimacy without sex .. Its nice when they both happen together but his is not always the case. I have sat in on some mixed oreintatin marriage discussions .. and while I cannot speak for all mixed oreintation marriages .. I will say that the one element that can be, at times, missing is not necessarily the sex but the intimacy. Depending on how much either spouse needs the intimacy this can be a major hurdle .. sometimes a hurdle that the couple is unable to overcome.
We are both straight here .. (at least I assume you are .. correct me if I am wrong). And I think we may be taking for granted an intimacy that we have with our wives that some couples .. due to mismatched orientation .. are not able to achieve.
Dave

By: StraightGrandmother

StraightGrandmother — Wed, 30 May 2018 18:28:52 +0000

Warren, this ought to be quite interesting. Who is arguing on the other side?
Don’t forget the statistics from the study,
Page 49
“Frequency of Intercourse Heterosexual Spouses 155
Never had sexual intercourse with their partner (n=69; 44.5%)
Less than once a month (n=25; 16.1%)
About one time a month (n=23; 14.8%)
Total = 74.4%
Greater than 4 times a week (n=8; 5.2%).
1-3 times a week (n=30; 19.4%)”
Total = 24.6%
————————————-
Need for Same-sex fantasy. The group of sexual minority respondents was Approximately 102 sexual minorities responded.
Initial stages of love- making,
54 (52.9%) No
30 (29.4%) A little necessary
18 (17.6%) Absolutely necessary
Total = 47%
Same Sex Fantasies further along during intercourse
102 sexual minorities responded
25 (24.5%) Never
32 (31.4%) Frequently
20 (19.6%) Occasionally
25 (24.5%) Yes, but not often
Total = 75.5%
———————————————-
Sexual Fantasies during intercourse, does the spouse know?
93 sexual minorities responded
60 (64.5%) No
33 (35.5%) Yes
A point that hits home to me (not literally my husband is hetro, like 100% hetro) is the harm that befalls the heterosexual spouses. There ARE victims in these attempted “conversions” don’t forget for every conversion it involves another person not just the sexual minority.
Page 48
Q. Future Potential of Marital Relationship
Sexual minority group 95 responded,
Extremely Positive about their relation ship’s future (n=37; 38.8%)
Positive (n=21; 22.1%),
Total = 60.9%
Neither positive or negative (n=18; 18.9%)
Negative (n=12; 12.6%)
Extremely negative (n=7; 7.4%).
Total = 38.9%
Heterosexual Spouses 113 individuals responded
Positive about their relation-ship’s future (n=29; 25.7%).
Extremely Positive (n=23; 20.4%)
Total = 46.1%
Neither positive or negative (n=23; 20.4%)
Extremely negative (n=22; 19.5)
Negative (n=16; 14.2%)
Total = 54.1%
Look how many of the heterosexual spouses are lukewarm to not that great about the future of their marriages.
Please don’t let these spouses be ignored and forgotten. It really irritates me in the debate about gender neutral marriage the anti side never ever talks about the children of the couples who are gay, lesbian, bi-sexual or transgender. They avoid like the plague, talking about these children because they KNOW that these children ARE HARMED when their parents are not allowed to marry. So when you try to discuss, “Well yes but what about the children” they change the subject. Please don’t let the subject be changed about the harm to the heterosexual spouses.
Ask the question after going over the statistics if the person on the other side would want their daughter or son to marry a sexual minority who is attempting to change their natural sexuual orientation behavior. I know I would not wish that for my children or grandchildren.
I can’t wait to see the interview!

By: Lynn David

Lynn David — Wed, 30 May 2018 18:12:12 +0000

LOL!!!

By: Lynn David

Lynn David — Tue, 26 Jul 2011 20:52:07 +0000

Kyle…. Well I think it is one thing to be presented with a sexual thought, or to notice someone as physically attractive, and another thing to “fantasize” about someone, which is to entertain and indulge those feelings and thoughts in a protracted way. The former happens to most of us who have a libido of some kind, and I think is morally neutral (or at least basically beyond our control), whereas the latter is where choice and responsibility comes in, I think.

So… what are you saying? That fantasizing about anyone in any situtation is somehow “bad?” Or only if you are fantasizing about someone of the same sex? Frankly, your ‘former’ sounds pretty much similar to fantasizing itself.
And if your point is simply about fantasizing about the same sex. How is that initial thought that begins one’s fantasy any different than the sexual thought when onen notices another as physically attractive?
Sure to continue there is choice and “responsibility” implied; but “responsibility” to what? To yourself? Or some nebulosity?