The “Fluidly” argument of ‘now I’m Gay’, ‘now I am Straight’ makes all LGBT sound crazy and sexually confused. It gives religious fanatics all the ammunition it needs against the LGBT community.

It is also bull shit. If you are sexually attracted to both genders to any degree — you are bisexual. And therapy or misidentification can not change that

Work what issues, Tom? I had no issues to work save that I am definitely oriented to men not just sexually but romantically. I started trying to change that at the age of 20 with a psychologist. It didn’t work then or when I tried again at 25. Why? Because there was no issue other than my sexuality.

LD, if you went into therapy because of pressure from someone other than yourself then I can understand your anger. Obviously, Tom should not be calling people imbeciles. However, just as his circumstance should not dictate yours neither should your circumstance dictate another persons. Some people really do change and some people really do have issues that contribute to their sexual dissatisfaction. You are not one of them.

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You seem to have found one or two or more, or at least made one up to fool yourself into believing you could change. I wouldn’t be so blunt but you’ve been pretty sure of yourself to call those such as me names like an “imbeciles.” I have known a few ex-gays and most all have not exhibited the lack of understanding that you have. Ok, there was the one guy who claimed to be ex-gay and that the Toronto Blessing (laughing and carrying on) had cured him. But then he claimed all gay men were child molesters, so I just had to ask him how many he had molested while gay. It’s just that you remind me of him.

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It’s simple people. Work your issues. Question your beliefs. Get in touch with all the enormity that is you. Get in touch with the conflict, the dichotomies. Hear your internal dialogue if you can. Be present to everything that has happened to you. Cry, Rage, Laugh …. you can’t help but change. But if some idiot shrink isn’t sure you can change, then the odds of them being able to help you change aren’t very good are they? If you don’t believe you can change, the odds of you changing are pretty low. And if all you want to do is deal with the issue on some surface level doing mental masturbation, instead of genuine emotive work … then prepare to go nowhere ….. work your issues, change of sexuality is a by product

Thank you for posting. I am a believer in change. The mantra of fixed sexuality has been devasting to many people. We don’t have to accept homosexuality OR heterosexuality as being “it”.

I’ve been straight for some 20 years. Started reorienting myself at 23. Was so gay I at times wished I was a woman so my desires and actions would be acceptable. And now, what do you know… I’m straight. Not some idiot saying they are straight when they have no lusts for women. Straight as in I love T&A and marriage seems a drag because I see women I’d like to have sex with numerous times a week. Sometimes several times a day.

Wake up, if the course you are taking or the psychologist or analysts you are working with aren’t facilitating change – then fire them, they have proven themselves to be blithering idiots… Then find a different direction.

But no, here I read this theoretical position, or that theoretical position, or that hypothetical or this hypothetical. If you want to never change, or for the shrinks … if you want to never be capable of facilitating change, then you’re on the right track here. I didn’t read all the comments but of the tremendous number I did, it’s apparent no common sense abounds here.

It’s simple people. Work your issues. Question your beliefs. Get in touch with all the enormity that is you. Get in touch with the conflict, the dichotomies. Hear your internal dialogue if you can. Be present to everything that has happened to you. Cry, Rage, Laugh …. you can’t help but change. But if some idiot shrink isn’t sure you can change, then the odds of them being able to help you change aren’t very good are they? If you don’t believe you can change, the odds of you changing are pretty low. And if all you want to do is deal with the issue on some surface level doing mental masturbation, instead of genuine emotive work … then prepare to go nowhere ….. work your issues, change of sexuality is a by product.