I was raised a liberal and my family supported my lesbian life. I am ex gay and don’t want to return to a lesbian identity or life or lifestyle (whatever anyone wants to call it) I doubt I would call myself homophobic. Did that ever cross your mind? — That some people just begin to see their sexuality and life differently than from a gay only perspective??

Next thing you know you’ll be telling me that the rooster is responsible for the sun coming up.

Of course the rooster is responsible for the sun coming up, didn’t you see “Rock-A-Doodle”? 🙂

Yes, I have thought of that and know some of it is true. I also know that it is personal as well and often an individual’s faith and values are imbedded a long time before an identity is claimed because of unwanted feelings. It is those individuals that I refer to – ones that have this conflict because of unwanted feelings and impulses and choose to seek help to understand and modify them rather than yield to them. Do you think they have a right to treatment?

I guess it never crossed your mind that it might be homophobia and not homosexuality that makes gay people unhappy to be gay.

I grew up in Mississippi in the 60’s. I can remember talking to black children my age who told me that they hated being black and that they wish they were white. By your deductive reasoning they were unhappy and wished they were white because of the inherent unhappiness of and evils of being black and not a result of living in a white dominated, racist and bigoted society and community.

Next thing you know you’ll be telling me that the rooster is responsible for the sun coming up.

No – LOL – typo – I meant that society still makes it difficult to be gay.

I have met gays who just did not want to be gay but were told it was the only way to be happy

I have also met gay people like this, but their unhappy feelings had to do more with they way they felt they were “SUPPOSED” to be, rather than by any internal values. There are many messages out there, in popular culture and from religious and other institutions saying you can’t be gay and happy, you can’t be gay and Christian, and if you’re going to be gay, then we’ll make sure you’re unhappy by making sure you don’t get equal rights. These things have to be dealt with as well.

I’m not suggesting that this will address or help all gay people who are unhappy with their orientation, but society still does make it very easy to be gay – and this has nothing to do with internal values. What a miserable way to live, indeed.

I can totally see your point. I have met gays who just did not want to be gay but were told it was the only way to be happy. What a miserable way to live – not having options.

I don’t think it can be shown – there are no stats – except there are stats on suicide. I think the gay community makes a claim about suicide from these individuals but there is not a statistical significance being shown? Why doesn’t the gay community follow up on these?? That would be an interesting project that would yield alot of benefit if it was proven.