Last week, the Southern Poverty Law Center posted a revision of their hate groups list, including the Family Research Council and the American Family Association, among other Christian organizations, on their anti-gay list of groups to watch. The SPLC insists that the groups placed on the list knowingly spread misleading information and harmful stereotypes about gay people that incite prejudice and harassment. Viewing homosexuality as unbiblical was not one of the criteria for inclusion.
Since then, representatives of these groups as well as some defenders have criticized the SPLC, suggesting that the list is really an effort to stifle differences of opinion and/or to persecute Christians for their beliefs. For the most part, the reaction of defenders of the newly labeled hate groups is to avoid addressing the issues the SPLC raised, instead preferring to attack the credibility of the SPLC.
Reviewing the charges leveled against the Christian groups, I think their responses are mostly unfortunate and unhelpful. The SPLC has identified some issues which are legitimate and have damaged the credibility of the groups on the list. Going forward, I hope Christians don’t rally around these groups but rather call them to accountability.
The SPLC identifies ten myths that the listed groups promote (the statements that are also links lead to blog posts where I address the issues). They are:
1. Homosexuals molest children at far higher rates than heterosexuals.
2. Same-sex parents harm children.3. People become homosexual because they were sexually abused as children or there was a deficiency in sex-role modeling by their parents. (see also here)
4. Homosexuals don’t live nearly as long as heterosexuals. (see also here and here)
5. Homosexuals controlled the Nazi Party and helped to orchestrate the Holocaust. (see also comments from historian Lothar Machtan)
7. Allowing homosexuals to serve openly would damage the armed forces.
8. Homosexuals are more prone to be mentally ill and to abuse drugs and alcohol. (see also here and here)
9. No one is born a homosexual. (see also here and here)
10. Gay people can choose to leave homosexuality.
(Note: the links above are not in the original SPLC article. They link to relevant articles or refer to work I have done to address these claims in past posts. I have done very little work on claims 2 and 7, however, I believe the groups on the SPLC hate list have distorted research to support their views on these issues (e.g., Bryan Fischer’s claim that gays in the military brought on the Holocaust as a talking point against repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell).
The SPLC offers valid criticisms of each one of these assertions. In fairness, the SPLC did not completely debunk each of these statements in their brief article, but they did raise legitimate factual concerns about how these assertions are communicated to the public.
I have spent much time addressing claims 1, 3-6 and 8-10 (click the links above for posts on these topics). The more I have researched these claims, the more disillusioned I have become with the credibility of the groups recently placed on the list. Even though I agree with some positions held by some of the groups on some issues (e.g., pro-life), I now investigate any factual claims for myself and accept nothing at face value.
Ultimately, this is a real problem for American Christianity. One should be able to trust Christian groups to provide accurate information and nuanced analysis. However, on issues relating to sexual orientation, I cannot trust them. For me, this lack of trust spills over to other domains as well, creating a significant problem with credibility. I hope my fellow believers will not defend these claims simply because those making them are Christians.
There are many negative consequences which derive from the myths, overgeneralizations and stereotypes. For instance, I know of a handful of situations where men were kept from their grandchildren or children by other family members because they disclosed same-sex attraction. Even though the men involved had no attraction for children, their families feared them because they experienced homosexual attractions. I know of more than one man who had to defend his right to have custody of his children because he divulged his homosexual attractions to a Christian leader. The families and Christian leaders were driven to fear because of rhetoric from one or more of the groups now on the SPLC list.
Surveys demonstrate that younger people are more moderate regarding homosexuality. They are more likely to view groups such as now occupy the SPLC list as being strident and harsh. Many such young people know GLBT people. They perhaps know some gays who could fit the stereotypes, but often they know more such persons who do not match up with the picture painted by the organizations in question. They also know straight people who have the same problems that are supposed to be more typical of gays. The effect of the hyperbole and stereotyping is to turn them off, sometimes toward the church in general.
To repeat, I hope Christians don’t circle the wagons and view the SPLC episode as a persecution of Christians for “righteousness sake” (Mt. 5:10). In my view, those who criticize the motives of the SPLC for making the designations miss the point. Even if the SPLC targeted Christian groups because those involved don’t like Christians, the substantial issues raised by the SPLC still remain. The SPLC did not bring up doctrinal issues, but rather issues of fact unrelated to any central tenets of Christianity.
Worries over free speech (e.g., Wendy Kaminer) are also distractions. The SPLC cannot stop these groups from misusing data or proclaiming their views. However, the SPLC can exercise free speech to criticize misleading assertions.
Instead, I hope Christians consider the words of Al Mohler, which could have been written about this very issue:
Yet, when gay activists accuse conservative Christians of homophobia, they are also right. Much of our response to homosexuality is rooted in ignorance and fear. We speak of homosexuals as a particular class of especially depraved sinners and we lie about how homosexuals experience their own struggle. Far too many evangelical pastors talk about sexual orientation with a crude dismissal or with glib assurances that gay persons simply choose to be gay. While most evangelicals know that the Bible condemns homosexuality, far too many find comfort in their own moralism, consigning homosexuals to a theological or moral category all their own.
Having examined the ten myths identified by the SPLC, I have to agree with Mohler – much of what is said by Christians about homosexuals is provably false and rooted in ignorance and fear. On point, leaders of the organizations targeted by the SPLC can defend themselves or they can use this crisis as a wake up call for reflection and change. My hope is that individual Christians and church leaders will not enable the defensiveness but instead demand the reflection and change.
Anne-Marie,
I think your church is entitled to a conviction and/or belief about any issue, however, if those convictions equate to exclusion in an way, then they have become a country club and not a church. My thoughts are if anyone wants to come to church for spiritual guidance and encouragement and fellowship, then they should be treated exactly the same way Jesus would treat them – with love and grace and encouragement.
…yes. I don’t think my church might fall into the country club category. I do not feel good about that. I think it is time for me to look into other churches…those that are gay affirming. Are there any suggestions for someone coming from an evangelical background? I was thinking of a Methodist church…
I mean “yes” I DO think it falls into the country club category
Anne-Marie,
I don’t have any specific suggestions regarding churches except that I would look for one that is accepting of all people who come for spiritual connection, guidance, encouragement, and fellowship. If the message/sermon stirs something inside you and leaves you a better person than when you came in, and if it is able to bring out the best in you afterward, during the week, then I certainly think it is worth going back again. I wouldn’t put any expectations on the congregants as they are there for their own personl reasons and might not be the same as your’s. Their convictions on any issue might not be in sync with your’s and that is an area where grace can be extended between each other.
Ann-Marie
I would echo what Ann has said. A church family is (or should not be) not ‘defined’ by ‘party lines’ on specific issues; it is founded upon relationship – with God and each other.
It may be that the church you currently attend can ‘grow’ in love, and you may be someone who can help to promote that growth. Sometimes churches can (or seem to) be a little ‘stuffy’, and a timely blast of fresh air, or some serious questioning of what appears to be ‘orthodox thought’, can lead to constructive change.
Specifically on the issue of Marriage: the biblical and traditional view is as it is for good scriptural reasons, which is why many of us do not think in terms of ‘gay marriage’ (but prefer to think of such concepts as ‘civil partnerships’). However, the reality of life is that there seem to be people who, for whatever reason, are simply not – and maybe never will be – ‘the marrying kind’. But human dignity is something that all possess, and this (theological) truth must be respected by all who call themselves Christians. After all, the Incarnation of the Word (something we celebrate at Christmastide in particular) reminds us that all human persons have intrinsic dignity. It is also, I and many others believe, the case that gay people are no less capable than straight people of forming loving relationships – and many do.
Whoops! My first paragraph should have been:-
“I would echo what Ann has said. A church family is not (or should not be) ‘defined’ by ‘party lines’ on specific issues; it is founded upon relationship – with God and each other.”
Hi Ann-Marie,
I think your question has more of a gray answer than just having two choices. All churches have requirements for membership. In a broader sense membership signifies that the church believes that the individual(s) are members of God’s heavenly kingdom. However, membership in a local church also signifies that the individual(s) are in agreement with some of the basic tenants of that church or denomination (re: salvation by faith .. the trinity .. and so forth).
I am a little surprised that your church has set certain moral views as requirements for membership. But they do seem to be consistent in their beliefs in that they are not setting aside a gay couple as a *special* case separate with how they would deal with a straight couple living together but not married. (Some might see some inconsistency here but I am looking at this in a general sense. And I am not talking here of whether we agree with the moral view expressed or not.)
In summary, I do not know that I would label your church as judgmental. Churches do have a need to protect their belief system and accept people that honor that system otherwise the church loses its unique identity and expression of what it believes. How a church does that is always a source of tension between the need to be receptive to everyone and the need to make sure its members express the identity and general beliefs of the church in their way of life. Typically .. the more involved one is in church leadership .. the more expectations a church may have of them to agree with the morals and theology of that church both in faith and practice. This, especially with leadership, is not judgment. It is how a church chooses leaders that express its beliefs and identity.
I think the question for you is whether you are comfortable with how your church expresses itself. Does if fall in a range that is acceptable to you? Only you can answer this question. It is a question, not of judgment, but of where you see yourself at this time in your life. Be aware that no church will be exactly where you want it to be. But is that their problem or yours? Are they challenging you to move from your position or is your life there a challenge to them to move from their position? Does God want you to stay there and be an influence from the inside or go elsewhere? Some folks are called out of certain churches by God … others are called to stay in certain churches by God. This is a matter of prayer and contemplation between you and God. No one else can answer this question for you.
May the Lord direct you in this and all aspects of your journey,
Dave
Ann
I do feel my church gives this to me now…
Richard
I really feel this might be a positive outcome of all of this…I’m starting to talk about this with a lot of people and it’s been interesting. For example, the other day I talked with someone from my bible study group who I think falls a bit into the “stuffy” category. I began the conversation and his tone was harsh at first…but within an hour, by the end of the conversation he understood and was sincerely filled with support for loving my brother and seeing this issue from the perspective I was struggling. I know my brother might continue to see my attending this church and even the argument that I might be helping the church to grow in love as being in denial of my “bigotry”. But I guess I’ll continue to cross that bridge.
Dave
I spent the morning yesterday with a friend, she’s relatively new to my church. And she helped me to see that people go to churches for all types of reasons. And that, something like what you’re saying, that a church might not have 100% of the things I need, but that doesn’t mean it’s invalid. I’m growing in faith, grace and love. My relationship with my family, although it seems pretty bad right now, is actually more love-filled than it’s ever been. It’s about love now, not about struggle or resentment. And she helped me to see that it might not be where I will always want to attend church, but that it might be right for now.
She also helped me to see that the real focus needs to be on my relationship with my brother and healing things with him. That this will take time, but the answer doesn’t lay in changing churches, even if my brother might see it like that.
I think the immediacy of all of this has come about because of the holidays and that I’m leaving for Africa for two weeks starting tomorrow. And the estrangement from my brother feels really difficult right now…as it should.
Thank you all, so much, for helping me to work through this. I think back to where I was even a week ago and things have changed in my heart so much. There isn’t a quick fix to this, it’s so much more important than that at so many levels. The grey area I’m sitting in right now is painful, but so meaningful.
Thank you again.
Dave
My unsettledness continues. Today I find myself feeling sad that I feel far from God. That the choice I am being put under, it seems, by my family is scaring me that I may not feel close to God again if I choose their path for me. My mother is irate, as is my brother about my choice in a church.
I have to be honest, when I joined the church a year and a half ago, it was a no-brainer for me. I loved the place, I felt everyone there was unabashedly in love with Christ which made me feel so at peace, so at home. When I first told my mother about the church, she started questioning me on the gay issue. And there wasn’t anything I heard from the pulpit, the members of the congregation or in the membership class that had to do with gay people really one way or another. It just wasn’t on the radar for me in my decision for finding a church home. I figured there were gay people at the church and I had the sense there was a broad range of views on the topic, but it just didn’t call me as an issue. And now I’m doubting even my own perception, my own experience.
But this has become a major issue. I think my brother vocalizing his incredible anger at me has scared me. And I’m scared of being scared. And my mother has joined him in this (although she has given a bit of a concession – “this is a _very_ important thing to your family, but you get to choose how you live your life Ann-Marie. It’s your life.”)
I feel trapped in that if I stay in my church, I am dishonoring my family in their eyes, although I feel I have learned to love my family in an amazing new way that is a direct result from my faith growing which I see in connection to where I am currently hearing the message of love and hope every week. On the other hand, if I try and do right by my brother and mother and seek out a new church that would be more pleasing to them, I may be sacrificing aspects of my faith in the process – for example turning away from what has nourished me spiritually in order to help my family through this. And, as my mother has told me, it probably wouldn’t make a difference to my brother.
It just seems there is something here more going on. I honestly can’t tell which way God is asking me to go.
From the heart of Africa,
Ann-Marie
Hi Ann-Marie
I am sorry to hear that you are having to face these difficulties. I am sensing an issue here separate and unique from the issues with understanding homosexuality and how you might respond. It seems your brother’s anger has an effect on your mother which then in turn collectively has an effect on you. There is nothing wrong with you. You have a right to choose any church you want to go to. I think that at some point you might consider finding someone you can trust .. an unbiased pastor or church leader or perhaps a trained counselor that you can sit down with and help you sort out your feelings. Also, you might find some insights in the following book: Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend.
I do trust and believe that God is very near to you. He is leading you. He has led you through this time of growth and is still leading you. Be still and know that He is God. Find worshipful times of quietness to spend with God. I personally find reading the Psalms helpful for this but you might find other things that are helpful.
Expect and allow yourself some time to work things out in your own heart and mind.
May the Lord bless you and guide you as He leads you down these new paths,
Dave
Dear Warren,
I was wondering how come you accept what SPLC and other liberal groups at face value, without even considering that they might be wrong? I went to FRC website, and found out that SPLC have misinterpreted their positions.